I don't believe in Peter Pan, Frankenstein or Superman

One thing which guarantees that travel never gets boring is that the people you meet will always be at least slightly 'different' to anyone that you ever met before. Different means not only varied but sometimes quite odd and just occasionally, a tad spooky. Once on a train from Vienna to Paris, a chap briefly introduced himself before enthusing passionately about how lucky the British were to have Mrs Thatcher as their Prime Minister. Mrs T was admittedly at the zenith of her career so many subscribed to his point of view, although perhaps less of them feel the same now. When I asked what it was specifically about her that he admired so much, he said it was for her great leadership skills and the endless time she devoted to help less able governments solve their problems on other planets.

[Yes I'll pause here just so you can read that again.
My neurons also had trouble processing these signals]

If I hadn't been paying full attention up to this point, then I certainly did from that moment onward. Thinking that something was slightly amiss, I casually hugged my personal possessions a little closer before asking the chap to clarify a little further. He took this as an open invitation to describe the great difficulties that people have on other worlds, trying to live peacefully but in a constant state of conflict, under weak governments that were unable to help their citizens due to corrupt politicians and the threat of strong militaries. He observed sagely how problems were much the same everywhere that you look in the universe. How great it was therefore, that Mrs T could spare the time from her own busy schedule to consult with our galactic neighbours, to manage their crises and to guide them through their problems. While his belief in his idol suggested that fragments of this chap had already slipped into another dimension, in most respects his feet remained firmly based in our reality. For example he was fully aware that any galactic neighbours would be so far away that Mrs T couldn't actually go to these worlds to help in person; the best she could do was to advise long distance. In other words he may have blown one cylinder but he was getting along quite well firing on the other five.

One way in which people certainly differ is the way that they relate to sport. Some cheer from a safe distance, others get sweaty together in a team while a few indulge alone for a little reflection or self testing. Similarly, while some only dabble occasionally, others have regular fixtures while a few show a near religious devotion. In Korea cycling and hiking are far and away the preferred opiates of the masses and virtually everyone is hooked.

Despite its rugged, mountainous terrain, South Korea already benefits from almost 2,000 km of dedicated cycle lanes across the length and breadth of the country. Those along Seoul's River Han are extremely popular with people of all ages. 

http://english.visitkorea.or.kr/enu/ATR/SI_EN_3_6.jsp?cid=1898731

South Korea: paradise for cyclists  

The phenomenal popularity of the sport is undoubtedly due to the supporting infrastructure which goes well beyond a simple cycle path and an occasional bench.  At regular intervals there are 7-Elevens, coffee shops, bike shops, hire and repair stations, cleaned and maintained washrooms, outdoor gyms, courts for playing tennis, badminton and basketball. Everything is set up at regular intervals along the routes so that no matter what happens, you're never more than 10 minutes away from a helpful pit-stop, car park, bus stop or train station.  There are even elevators to cycle over-bridges and stairs with ramps to link the cycle routes together over the main auto routes.

Need to cross the highway ?
Use the cycle elevator or the stairs with cycle gutter rail

A quick glimpse at the global bicycle market reveals the following;

• In 1950 global automobile and bicycle production were approximately equal at 10 million units per year.
  By 2000 global automobile production increased to 40 million while global bicycle production increased to 100 million
  
• Global bicycle production in 2016 is estimated at 133 million units
• Globally China is the largest producer of and market for bicycles, producing 57% of the world's bicycles.
  In Europe Germany is the largest market for bicycles.
  http://www.persistencemarketresearch.com/market-research/bicycle-market.asp
• cycling and cycle accessories now account for one eighth of money we spend on sports.  It is now the largest single category in the worldwide sports market
  http://www.bike-eu.com/sales-trends/nieuws/2015/12/2014-global-cycling-market-valued-at-e-35-7-billion-10125262
• In a list of 10 European countries, the UK ranks 10th for the number of km cycled per person per day but 3rd for the number of people killed per 100km cycled
  http://www.ibike.org/library/statistics-data.htm

"You say Rolls I say Royce

You say God give me a choice

You say Lord I say Christ

I don't believe in Peter Pan, Frankenstein or Superman

All I wanna do is Bicycle..."

The video to Queen's 1978 single Bicycle Race featured 65 naked models.
Subsequently the video was either censored or banned outright in many countries worldwide.
As much fun as this must have been, it still didn't do for cycling what South Korea has done today.

Topless cyclists join Freddie on stage at Madison Square Gardens in Nov 1978.
Worldwide it did wonders for the sale of Queen albums, leather pants and thongs but precious little for bicycles

Perhaps uniquely in Korea there is no concept for 'entry level'; if you're into something, it's all-consuming.  Whether cycling alone, in pairs, in families or in teams, the cycling equipment itself is nothing short of top notch. It's not unlikely that the bike wheels alone set the owner back US$4,000 and the rest of the bike maybe 3 to 5 times as much. The whole thing together may weigh little more than 6kg and is so sleek that it is near-invisible when viewed from in front or behind. 

Equally there is no entry level for the rider's outfit, kit and accessories. No self respecting cyclist wears tennis shoes, basketball shorts, a football shirt, a skating helmet, or driving gloves. Cycling demands only the latest high-living, ever-giving, cool-fizzing, cycle-whizzing sportswear; the costs of which will certainly make your eyes water unless, of course, you're wearing your dedicated cycling sun shades ;)

All or nothing: if you're going to do something, do it right

The last generation could spend a year's salary on a new car. This generation can spend the same on a new bicycle.

The Dog Days of Summer

Endurance tests have long since become a cheap distraction with any number of increasingly tacky formats competing to see how long a person can sit on a block of ice, lie in a box of snakes or eat hot chilies before they give up, sit up or throw up. Mostly these trials are conjured up by reality TV for willing participants who are paid handsome fees according to their perceived entertainment value. However, back in real life some of us are annually subjected to impossibly cruel endurance tests, against our will with absolutely no chance of surrender, escape or relief. In Seoul, the worst of these tests is undoubtedly the Dog Days of Summer.

The Dog Days are generally the hottest, most humid and oppressive days of summer. The exact timing of the days drifts slightly from year to year, but begin with the rising of Sirius, the Dog Star, just before sunrise in late July or early August. 

Sirus the Dog Star (right) rising just before sunrise: this marks the start of the Dog Days of summer

In many western cultures the Dog Days used to mark an ominous period of summer fevers and/or languid apathy. In ancient Egypt they indicated the onset of the flooding of the Nile.  In Korea the Dog Days mark the warmest 30 days of the summer; starting 13 July and ending 12 August (in 2016). For farmers this is the peak of the growing season but for unfortunate city dwellers this is about as close to a vacation in flaming Hell that anyone wants to experience in this lifetime (or the next !).

Summer in the city -
 During the Dog Days, water is a must

Empirical measurements of temperature and humidity don't even begin to convey the tedium of the Dog Days in the city. Maximum daytime temperatures may hit 35'C/95'F with humidity exceeding 85%. Overnight minima may not fall much below 28'C/82'F with humidity touching 95%. However, what makes these suffocating conditions acutely testing is the near total lack of wind together with a day-after-day failure to provide even the briefest relief by virtue of a short shower or an occasional cloud.  This despite the humidity being almost high enough to be able to lick the moisture directly from the very air itself. As difficult, oppressive and fatiguing as these conditions become, they would be nothing special without adding a few crafty Korean twists to the misery.


It is about this time of year that some bright sparkie typically discovers something that should have been realised about 10 years earlier.  For example in May 2013 it was revealed that that the quality certificates for safety-critical cabling on 2 of the nation's nuclear power stations were faked. 


http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2013-06-03/south-korea-issues-power-shortage-warning-amid-nuclear-stoppages

The incident rapidly spiraled into a total public relations meltdown as detailed investigation showed that the owner of the power station (Korean Energy and Power Company, KEPCO) actually colluded with suppliers to fake the quality certificates.

http://m.hankyung.com/apps/english.view?aid=201608121025281&category=

The Dog Days of 2013: unprecedented power shortages as a result of forged quality certificates

Orders were immediately given to shut down the affected reactors just two months before the start of the Dog Days. These unexpected shutdowns were not compensated by delaying the outage of any other power plants, so basically 2 weeks before the Dog Days, the country was already using about as much power as it could generate. In the head office of KEPCO, the display above the front desk showed that the country's grid was on the brink of collapse; power consumption was already 96.5% of the maximum available power generation.

Against this background, the govt issued emergency orders to reduce power consumption. Manufacturing production was staggered throughout the day to smooth out the peaks in demand. Escalators were rationed to operate during peak hours only. Meanwhile all government, corporate and retail premises were ordered to reset their air conditioning to only operate when temperatures exceeded 26'C/79'F.  Such premises included most places where people usually seek refuge from the scorching heat, including the subway systems, the shopping malls and offices. Of course, to show the nation how hardened its employees already are to hardship and sacrifice, Samsung execs directed that its thermostats would be reset to activate the aircon only above 28'C/82'F (see the above link to Bloomberg's article).  The Korean battle-cry of "Fighting !" was politely stifled around the offices as middle management hurriedly put their hands in their pockets to finance armfuls of ice lollies to prevent their teams from lapsing into comas.   

And so began 6 of the longest, least hygienic, most punishing weeks of life in the city. Each day hordes of hapless office dwellers were condemned to faithfully report to work, just to sit and experience what happens to a casserole when it is put in a slow cooker for 10 hours. By 10 in the morning people's socks were already squelching in their shoes.  By noon people were sitting in puddles of their own juices, pooled in the fabric of the seats of their chairs.  By 4pm the sweat was actually rolling off the back of their eyeballs and draining freely out through their ear canals as they desperately held the front of their shirt open in front of 4 feeble desk fans running full throttle from the USB ports of their laptops. Whatever this was, it sure wasn't civilisation.

Dog Days in the city - you wouldn't wish it on your best friend or your worst enemy !

The cynic'c post script to this episode is that the most valuable lesson learned from the 2013 debacle may not be that quality certificates should not be faked.  Rather the operators of government, corporate and retail premises learned how much they could reduce their electricity costs by rationing the use of escalators and air conditioning. Subsequently, since the Dog Days of 2013, despite no further critical power shortages, a more responsible use of power seems to have taken hold. Selected subway escalators still only operate in peak hours while the ambient temperatures in most large buildings are now sensibly higher than the super-cooled days before 2013. 




   

The Eternal Victim

While a strong sense of national pride can be found in many corners of the globe, there are few countries in which that pride is firmly rooted in the endless suffering of its citizens. Of course the worst kind of suffering comes from being a victim of others and so endless suffering means being the eternal victim. Far and away the world's most accomplished actors in the role of The Eternal Victim can be found in Korea. Whether it is historical victimisation by evil colonists, present victimisation by an upstart neighbour or being the future victim of a rapidly dwindling population, no opportunity is missed to don the mask of The Eternal Victim and then hobble feebly around the international stage reminding the world of their timeless, unjust suffering.

Politicians, the media and academics alike routinely exploit every opportunity to remind the nation that South Korea is, once again, the blameless victim of yet another injustice. As a former 'protectorate' of Japan, Korea was not only the victim of brutal Japanese colonialism but is still subject to Japanese imperialist claims over the disputed Dokdo/Takeshima Islands. 

The Dokdo/Takeshima Islands (also Liancourt Rocks)
46 acres of international tension

 As a neighbour of North Korea, South Korea is constantly being harassed by Kim Jong-Un, the 'Comrade of the North'. But of course it doesn't stop there; beyond North Korea there is a 'darkly conspiratorial China', 'deliberately refusing' to reign in North Korea so China may take advantage of the instability on the peninsula. Then there's any number of daily injustices reported in the media, including;

• Koreans are the real victims of the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki;
  http://www.breitbart.com/national-security/2016/05/27/chinese-korean-media-attack-obama-hiroshima-apology/
  
  http://www.ndtv.com/world-news/south-korea-a-bomb-victims-angered-by-obamas-hiroshima-visit-1412418

• Koreans are the real victims of Japanese economic policy
  http://qz.com/66982/south-koreas-shock-gdp-slump-shows-abenomics-has-claimed-its-first-major-victim/

Since Japan has driven down the value ot the Yen,
Psy is reportedly the only Korean export to buck the trend of slowing growth of Korean GDP

• Koreans are the real victims of Japanese schoolbook propaganda
  http://world.kbs.co.kr/english/news/news_Po_detail.htm?No=117689

• South Koreans are the victims of North Korean espionage
http://www.koreaherald.com/view.php?ud=20160720000677

• South Koreans are the victims of everybody else's air pollution; industrial emissions from China, yellow dust from Mongolia's deserts, smoke from Indonesia's forest, etc, ad infinitum
  
  http://www.ibtimes.com/smog-korea-coal-power-plants-not-china-are-major-culprits-says-greenpeace-1835638
  
  

Curiously the media has not yet proffered a boffin to explain how these dangerously high levels of 'foreign pollution' concentrate in a cloud over the centre of Seoul while the rest of the country remains relatively unpolluted.  No doubt the first person to do this will become a national hero.

Air quality indices across South Korea on 10 Aug 2016.
Red indicators in and around Seoul show dangerously unhealthy concentrations of PM2.5 particles.
Pollution in the surrounding countryside are low by comparison 

Since the Korean war ended in 1953 and the emergence of two separate Koreas instead of one, South Korea took on the persona of the smallest kid in the playground; the one who is misunderstood, is especially vulnerable, has no friends to speak of and is regularly victimised by all the other kids in the neighbourhood. Fortunately the biggest kid in the playground flexed its muscles, pledged its unswerving support and so for decades the US has maintained a fully equipped deterrant of approx 30,000 troops in South Korea. The annual US/South Korean military drills on land, at sea and in the air are a regular show of that commitment. 

Observers might have hoped that with the huge clout of friends like the US, South Korea would have used its boosted international status to move past the mistakes of the colonial era, to bury the greivances of WW2, to mend fences and build new bridges with its neighbours and go on to take a leadership role in an economic community of south Asian powerhouses, through which to promote trade, prosperity and stability of the entire region. This would not be an unreasonable achievement for a hard-working, rapidly industrialising, wealthy nation with a little vision and firm US backing. Sadly, the inability to let the dust settle on the events of WW2 (which ended 70 years ago) and the penchance to mewl constantly about the injustice of it all to anyone who will listen, ultimately prove to be the defining characteristics of what could have been the most highly achieving nation of the modern era. 

Instead the smallest kid in the playground remains content to stand on the shoulders of the largest kid, from where it simply thumbs its nose at its neighbours and paints them all as the bad guys. While the little kid enjoys the comfort and security of an unassailable ally, he fails entirely to win any credibility or respect for himself in the playground. His neighbours look forward to the day then the biggest kid moves on, at which point the smallest kid will wish that he had made more friends when he had the chance. 

President Trump: Things that make you go; "Hmmm......"

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-36423319